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Many of our problems come from within our own minds. They aren't caused by events, bad luck, or other people. We cause them through our own poor mental habits. Here are 10 habits you should set aside right away to free yourself from the many problems each one will be causing you.
许多问题的造成其实并不是因为我们自己运气差或者别人有意为之。事实上,这些问题往往是由我们自己的坏习惯产生的。这里列出了十个习惯希望能够帮助你摆脱这些自己造成的麻烦又没必要的烦恼:
Stop jumping to conclusions. There are two common ways this habit increases people’s difficulties. First, they assume that they know what is going to happen, so they stop paying attention and act on their assumption instead. Human beings are lousy fortune-tellers. Most of what they assume is wrong. That makes the action wrong too. The second aspect of this habit is playing the mind-reader and assuming you know why people do what they do or what they're thinking. Wrong again, big time. More relationships are destroyed by this particular kind of stupidity than by any other. 英语堂欢迎大家到来
不要过早下结论。过早下结论会通过两条途径为你制造麻烦。第一是,你会认为自己已经了解所有的事情的发展,所以不再重视这件事情,而按照自己假设的发展方式操作事情。可惜人类并不是一种会算命的种类,所以大部分的假设都是错误的,这样也导致的事情常常失败;第二是,你会猜测别人的想法并且会做出假设,同样的,这些假设通常也是错误的。而且这些愚蠢的假设也导致了你与他人的关系被破坏。
Don't dramatize. Lots of people inflate small setbacks into life-threatening catastrophes and react accordingly. This habit makes mountains out of molehills and gives people anxieties that either don't exist or are so insignificant they aren't worth worrying about anyway. Why do they do it? Who knows? Maybe to make themselves feel and seem more important. Whatever the reason, it's silly as well as destructive.
不要小题大做。很多人因为一些小挫折的刺激而做出过激的反应。小题大做使人变得紧张兮兮,产生过多的忧虑。
Don't invent rules. A huge proportion of those "ought" and "should" that you carry around are most likely needless. All that they do for you is made you feel nervous or guilty. What's the point? When you use these imaginary rules on yourself, you clog your mind with petty restrictions and childish orders. And when you try to impose them on others, you make yourself into a bully, a boring nag, or a self-righteous bigot. copyright englishtang
不要发明规则。过分的使用“应该”和“应当”是没必要的。这些词除了让你感到紧张外,不会有任何用处。为什么?因为当你使用这些发明的规则时,你会变得受约束和有孩子气的命令口气。而当你试图将这些规则强加于他人时,只会让别人对你产生厌恶的情绪(霸权,自以为是的)
Avoid stereotyping or labeling people or situations. The words you use can trip you up. Negative and critical language produces the same flavor of thinking. Forcing things into pre-set categories hides their real meaning and limits your thinking to no purpose. See what's there. Don't label. You'll be surprised at what you find.
避免给他人扣帽子。对别人否定的评价也会限制你对他的看法和想法。所以,避免预先给别人扣帽子,说不定你就可以发现别人其他不同一般的地方。
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