新东方雅思班一位学生发给我的作文，要求修改，里面出现的问题请各位注意！
　　
　　文章修改过程中用到了很多课上所讲的句式和表达，希望大家能够熟练使用和掌握！
　　
　　Topic:
　　
　　Some people think that teachers should be responsible for teaching students how to judge right and wrong and how to behave well, some say that teachers should only teach students about academic subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
　　
　　原文：
　　
　　As a result of the responsibility of a teacher,One side argument is they orght to teach the students how to distinguish right and wrong and how to be a human being well.the other side view is they should solely teach students about academic konwledges.In the following paraguaphs I will discuss each argument.
　　
　　First,teaching konwledges is a initial responsibility of a teacher.they should make every student learned various konwledges and the methods of how to study. When the students are studying in the primary school,they do not know anything about different subjuct. A good teacher should have the ability of how to guide the students to study and improve the attention of students increasingly paying to the various subject.
　　
　　On the other hand, apart from academic knowledges the students also need other skills. It is necessary that the teacher taught the students how to realise everything of the society, such as teammork,uderstanding each other, helping someone when he or she needs, in addition,the teacher also need teach the students how to solre the problems they meet, and how to face the difficult time and so forth.

　　In conclution,Teacher plays a significant role in Education of students. The academic knowledges and social skills were learned through the teachers. Thus, They should not only teach varions knowledges, but teach every social technologies as well.
　　
　　整体点评：
　　
　　原文问题包括：
　　
　　1.简单的语法和表达错误
　　
　　2.论证过程逻辑混乱
　　
　　3.没有完成写作任务之中的：state personal view
　　
　　4.语言，尤其是句式的变化有待提高
　　
　　针对以上问题，建议：
　　
　　1. 在写作之前：按照课上多讲“先结构、后句式”的审题顺序将文章结构安排合理。
　　
　　2. 日常的写作练习中强化单句写作的能力：即，一种意思能用两种以上表达方式进行写作。
　　
　　3. 写完整篇文章之后：务必检查：单复数、拼写等。 　

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