Everyday English:To Err Is Not Only Human

Recently, there have been so many reports in the newspaper
about airplane crashes and people dying, that people think
airplanes are very unreliable. So the scientists and an aviation
company were cracking their heads trying to make a new
airplane that had no need for manpower; it was just
completely automatic and electronic, with computer voice
communication and all that.
So the first one ever was finally made. And everyone was
very excited; the passengers who came up to board it for the
first time were like the guests of honor. And they all came
aboard and then everything was done. The doors closed, and
they took off. When they were in mid-air already they heard
a voice, speaking from the loudspeaker: "Dear valued
customers, gentlemen and ladies. Welcome to the first ever
electronically controlled airplane. We are forever done with
human-controlled aircraft, because this is electronically piloted.
You will be safe and secure. So just fasten your seatbelts, sit
back and enjoy your trip. Because this is all electronically
controlled, nothing can ever go wrong, go wrong, go wrong,
go wrong, go wrong..." And then of course everyone panicked
and ran and tried to find a way to get out. But there came a
calm voice over the back-up system. It was a very calm, cool
and collected voice, saying: "Ladies and gentlemen, sit back.
There is nowhere to go but here and now." Then the same
voice said, "Please repeat after me, 'Our Father who are
in Heaven'..."