1. Ask For Praise. 请求表扬

Expecting your partner to notice things without prompting is often very unfair and can lead to resentment. Keep the beast away by speaking up and bringing attention to things you’d like your partner to notice. If you’ve done something you’d like your partner to take notice of, say something! Got your hair did? Say something! Fixed the dining room table so it doesn’t teeter? Say something!
在无提示下期望你的情人注意到某些事，通常非常不公平也容易导致不满。远离这种讨厌的事，坦率地讲明白你希望你的情人注意到某些事。如果你已经做完了你希望对方注意的事，说出来！你做了头发？说出来！修理了餐厅的桌子使它不再摇晃？说出来！

You did this instinctively when you were a child. Remember running up to a parent or guardian and asking them to look at a picture you’d colored or cape you’d made out of an expensive tablecloth? For most of us, the response was one of amazement (if a bit contrived) and vocal appreciation for our obvious talents.
当还是个小孩的时候你会本能地这么去做。还记得你跑到父母或监护人面前要他们看看你涂上了颜色的一副画或者用一张昂贵地桌布做成了披肩吗?对我们大多数人来说，对我们显地才华，这种反应是惊奇（如果有一点小发明）和大声赞扬中的一种。

You’re not so very different now. You still love to be praised when you’ve done well. Even if it’s something you should have done earlier in the week or missed a detail on. How to get that praise? Ask for it and agree to give it when your partner asks you for some appreciation. You know not to crush a child’s spirit by ignoring their efforts to impress you. Are you as smart about your partner?
如今你也没有多大的不同。当你干好某事后你仍然想被表扬。就算是那些你本来这周应该早就完成的或是错过了细节的事。怎么去获得赞扬？去请求表扬并同意当你的情人需要时你也给出赞扬。你知道不能因忽略孩子们为了给你留下印象而做出的努力打击他的心灵。你是否像你父母那样聪明？

2. In Everything, Give Thanks 对每件事，表示感谢

Say “Thank You” and make an effort to regularly demonstrate your genuine gratefulness for all your partner does for you. There are going to be times when this will seem an impossible chore. Perhaps you’ll be furious with your partner over something or other and they’ll point out something they did, hoping for praise. How will you respond? Will you offer your praise and thanks then deal with your anger separately? Or will you close up like a shell and torture your partner with inconsolable silence?
说“谢谢”并努力经常地表露你真诚地感谢情人为你做的所有。需要时间来讲这些变成一种不烦闷的事。也许你会因为某事对你的情人或其他人暴怒，他们会指出他们做了的某事，希望被赞扬。你会如何反应？你会表示你的赞赏和感谢然后独自处理你愤怒的情绪？或者你会像个贝壳那样关闭自己用极度沮丧的沉默折磨你的情人？

You care about making your relationship work so I expect you’ll swallow your momentary pride and say thank you. After all, your partner deserves at least the same courtesy you’d give to a complete stranger. When you cannot be gracious, be polite. Make a habit of offering thanks to your partner, even for the tiniest of things, and a sapling of thankfulness will grow into something strong enough to support you both.
你担心你的感情生活所以我希望你能收起你短暂的骄傲然后表达出感谢。毕竟，你的爱人应该得到至少你对一个完全陌生人表达出的礼貌。当你无法做到亲切时，至少保持礼貌。养成对爱人表达感谢的习惯，即使对最微小的事，一句感谢的幼苗会成长为强壮地足够支持你们两人的大树。

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